Insomnia Has Taken Over Me

Aarghhhhhhh!!!


Common sleep! Common Sleep! Get me In! Damn! I m tired of saying this 'mantra' again and again every night from 12 to 2am. I have tried everything that my parents suggested. Something as stupid as saying'A,B,C,D,...'. or even 'Z,Y,X,W,V,...' or counted numbers from 1 to 100, or 100 to 1, multiples of 2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 uptil 100. And even said the little prayers that I know. "Lekin ye kambhakt neend aati hi nahi". Even after 2am if I am sleeping, my mind does not shut, Its running continuously for the past 3 weeks now. What Am I thinking. I cant recollect. Sounds weird. But its true. I have started sleeping with a book and a pencil close to me so that when I get up, I can pen down the thoughts. But I open my eyes thinking I ll write it, take the pencil, my cellphone's torchlight, open the page and "Magic". 'Dhoooomb'..... the thought process is gone. Yes it is. I have tried thrice till today. And same result. 'Dhoooomb'..... its gone. Then the next 2 hours I again change sides, change faces, and think what I was thinking cause I m such a 'jiddy' boy that I just cant let go...... Oh I am an Insomniac!


Insomnia: is a symptom which can accompany several sleep, medical and psychiatric disorders, characterized by persistent difficulty in falling asleep and/or staying asleep despite the opportunity which is typically followed by functional impairment while awake including both organic and non-organic insomnia without other cause constitute a sleep disorder and another definition of insomnia is "difficulties initiating and/or maintaining sleep, or nonrestorative sleep, associated with impairments of daytime functioning or marked distress for more than 1 month."

Damn this! I have both!


My Insomnia


The time is 11:45pm
Studies arent registering in my system
So that it for the day:
I brush my teeth
Take my meds
And walk to the my Bed!
What a Climax.....
But then here we have the anticlimax,
Its a long journey to my Bed,
Am I excited?
No...
Am I Happy?
Why....
Am I Stresed?
Whats that.....
Alienatic things...
Oh but I m definitely tired.
I want my sleep I pray to God
I want that sleep I pray to God
But no he wont listen.
I am finally on my bed.
I put the alarm for 7am
It saya i have 7 hours approx to go
Then the mystery starts
I ll change the radio stations
I ll change the tracks on my player
But no, sleep still wont come.
I ll say A,B,C,D,E...
I ll say Z,Y,X,W,V...
I ll say 1,2,3,4,5...
I ll say 100, 99, 98 97..
Still no...
I look at the Alarm...
Of Fuck its saying 6 hours 15 mins to go.
That means I am 45 mins on the bed.
Doing "Nothing".
Sorry did I say Nothing?
'TRYING TO GET SLEEP MAN!'
Then finally i am in a trance.
Yes trance, not sleep.
My mind is thinking,
My mind is concentrating,
My mind is working,
My mind is in motion.
But what the fuck is it doing?
(CANT MAKE HEAD OR TAIL)
Then suddenly,
Ohh its that what I am thinking about
I remember about my promise to pen it down
I wake up with a start
Find my pencil, my cellphone torch,
My book,
I say to my self 'quick quick..'
I do all these things in 8 seconds...
But bhooosh.....its gone
Its gone...
I look at the alarm
Vow what a sight.
Just 5 hours before my alarm starts ringing.
Then the process continues
I change sides
I change my position
I put my head under the bedsheet
I sleep upside down
I change the fan speed
I go to the loo
I drink water
I try to sleep on my stomach
But alassss
My mind is thinking,
My mind is concentrating,
My mind is working,
My mind is in motion.
Now Its thinking what disturbed my sleep earlier
I look at the alarm again
Time is 3 am
4 hours to go.
In an hour and a half
my milkman will be at the door.
Damn...

And then finally between 3 and 315..
I m sleepin...
Finally Sleeping..
Vow what a feeeling in hindsight..
This is my story as an Insomniac


PS: Pray for me that I m blessed with a good sleep. And a better memory to pen down my mind dreams.